`take my HAND* NEVER let go-

take my HAND; and GUIDE me through*

Friday, March 23, 2007
11:52 AM

I always remind myself I was once an A10, the lowest rank below the rest. So, at present, this reminds me to be tolerant towards A10's mistakes. I wanna be the patient and understanding A11, who is able to teach the A10s. I believe I had always been this way,until now...

I am so disappointed with myself, with my short temper. I am so disappointed with her. She's slow, she cant finish what's assigned to her, yet she din say till we found out towards the end of engagement!!! So, being the "Shit Carrier", I had to clear her "shit". Her responsibility became mine. I am really pissed. I believe I had helped her in nearly 80% of her sections and the engagement is 2 wks!! The senior and us were really shocked!! I mean she seemed to be working so hard and doing a lot of things for the past wk.. but nothing comes out!!! We were deceived. N I am being arrowed to do the thing that most of us hated. Clear others' "shit".

I trusted her so much, trusted her capability and experience and character. But she disappointed me. Many times I just wanna scream at her or cry in front of her and beg her to work faster. This is audit, team work, deadline.. We cant afford to take our own sweet time. Indeed, she made me see the reality of audit, made me wanna leave, once and for all. What do I get back in return? I was working till 3 am last night, somemore I was having a fever! N she's in her bed, sleeping soundly! What the hell! I am really very pissed, really really pissed. I had done and completed my sections, I should be relaxing. First time blowing my top at work. She created my history.

N now, sickly me is patiently waiting for her to send me what she had done. waiting, waiting.. before I can be assured she did correctly, then can I go c doc..Damm, why m I working when I am sick??

Fen

hold me TIGHT; and NEVER let go*